As it goes...

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Re: As it goes...

Postby Canadabum » 26 Oct 2015, 16:01

Hopeful...sending you a virtual hug. So sorry to hear that you had a set back -- I know how discouraging those can be and how scary it can be. Unfortunately this sort of thing happened to me a bunch of times....

A couple thoughts come to my mind...#1, you were not wrong or at fault for living it up a little. In fact, I personally think it is important to inject a little carefree attitude in to your life from time to time -- so please dont blame yourself for this...for all you know this would have happened to you if you were on a diet of applesauce and prunes every day. #2...you healed pretty well once, you can do it again!! Your body has already proven it is pretty strong and resilient so dont give up on yourself quite yet -- you may surprise yourself. As for looking at the surgical option -- why not. If you are at a stage where this is taking over your life and you find a really good qualified surgeon then that option should definitely be explored. I have read of a bunch of very positive and encouraging recoveries from surgery...
As for being sore due to the butt plug thing....give yourself a few days to feel a bit better after the pop before you play around down there...personally i would sit on heat as much as possible and just take it easy. Once the soreness and rawness dissipate then experiment with the plug -- just my opinion.
Wishing you a better day each day,
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Re: As it goes...

Postby hopefull » 26 Oct 2015, 20:12

Thanks Canadabum. I'm not sure I am really healing if I can't have a formed BM that's why I feel I need to heal stretched this time around rather than with a narrow canal.

My baby decided to stop breastfeeding a few days ago which is why I feel now I can consider surgery. You're right, I just need to find a surgeon that I feel confident with. Still not sure if surgery before another baby is a good idea.

Thanks again for the virtual hug, I needed that.
AF since Jan '15 postpartum
Taking: Lax-sachets, flaxseed oil, Mg
Topical: Diltiazem, Sudocrem
Circulation: Warm wheat bag, relax, short walks
Tried: Rectogesic, slippery elm, Lactulose
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Re: As it goes...

Postby Shania213 » 05 Nov 2015, 14:16

hopefull wrote:Hi

Thought I would write a diary, like a lot of people on here have realised there is only so much that partners, friends and families can stand listening to about one's bottom :D I just need to get the daily stresses off my chest.

A bit of background.....
I developed an AF postpartum PP, not during labour but a few weeks after, I am trying to work out in my head at the moment what has caused it. Some say it is hormones, that the drop in estrogen causes the skin to thin which has already been put through a lot of stress during pregnancy and labour. I remember that straight after giving birth to my son I had the best hair and skin of my life. I thought that it was due to all the nutrients finally going to me rather than him in the womb but perhaps it was hormonal as estrogen is related to hair and skin health. Now my hair and skin has gone bad again and in fact I am at the PP loosing hair stage, does this mean that my estrogen levels have dropped right off? I am breast feeding and considering giving it up, a sad and very difficult decision to make but the AF has affected my sex life and I am nervous that if I don't heal soon that the AF will affect future pregnancies due to too much scar tissue.

Wish I could do a PhD on AF's and pregnancies.

My current status.....
I bleed with every BM and have a sharp pain as I feel it tear but the pain usually dissipates to a niggle during the day once I have applied GTN and sat on the warm wheat bag for half and hour. I've been at this stage for some time now, had a few days of not bleeding with very loose BM's but overall it has been months of this status. I've stopped walking as I feel it rubbing but wondering if the exercise is better than not exercising and perhaps I could put some vaseline on first, what are others experience with exercise, good or bad?

Thanks for reading, thank goodness for this site, how did people survive without forums! :thanx:



Hiya, I read your post with interest because I was diagnosed with low estrogen from a blood test and now I have a fissure!
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Re: As it goes...

Postby Canadabum » 22 Nov 2015, 22:51

Hopeful - checking in, how are you. Any further thoughts on surgery?

All best - CB
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Re: As it goes...

Postby hopefull » 30 Nov 2015, 03:37

Hi Canadabum, thanks for checking in on me. I've been a bit absent from the forum. Sort of on purpose and sort of because I've been too busy but have been meaning to check in for a while. I got despondent after the re-tear and decided to ignore it as much as possible for a while. Today I am trying to cut back on the stool softener again but am doing it a lot more carefully than last time. Trialing a half dose in the morning and a half dose in the evening. Ate steamed veges and dhal and porridge today and have done some dilating. Dilating seems to help but it is slow and I have to keep at it. Also helps to sit on my wheat bag prior to dilation.

I see the surgeon on Thursday so will ask for a proper inspection and then start to think about surgery after that.

Funny thing is a went away the past week and caught up with a friend who had a baby a month prior to me and she too has a fissure. After a year of dealing with it, I didn't realise. Makes me wonder how many of us out there.

I'm nervous for my BM tomorrow. Will try and envision that I am doing the dilating and it is all ok and controlled and perhaps play a game on my phone to relax me. I'm a little bit sore now, probably from the nervousness. But I suppose if I don't try to wean then I will never know.

Curious thing Shanaia123, wonder if I should get my estrogen levels checked.
AF since Jan '15 postpartum
Taking: Lax-sachets, flaxseed oil, Mg
Topical: Diltiazem, Sudocrem
Circulation: Warm wheat bag, relax, short walks
Tried: Rectogesic, slippery elm, Lactulose
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Re: As it goes...

Postby hopefull » 30 Nov 2015, 16:56

Just checking in....BM was fine today, suspect the effect of cutting back on the PEG/Mirilax/Movical/Lax-sachets is delayed so will have to be careful for a few days.
AF since Jan '15 postpartum
Taking: Lax-sachets, flaxseed oil, Mg
Topical: Diltiazem, Sudocrem
Circulation: Warm wheat bag, relax, short walks
Tried: Rectogesic, slippery elm, Lactulose
hopefull
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Re: As it goes...

Postby Canadabum » 30 Nov 2015, 22:16

Good to hear from you. I know how upsetting a set back can be...no fair!!

Glad to hear dilation has been helping. My own spasms seem to have subsided and I wonder if it was stress related for me.

I too have discovered that many of my friends have either gone through it have fissures...men and women. Seems pretty common really.

Glad to hear you had a decent experience today...hope it continues.

All best - Canadabum
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Re: As it goes...

Postby hopefull » 11 Dec 2015, 15:24

Thought I would post here since being to the new surgeon last week, I've given a bit of an update on another post but nice to have it all in the one place.
So the visit to the surgeon was a lot more pleasant than previous trips as they sat down and talked with me! Finally...
He said I need to start using my bowel normally again and stop with the 'cow pat' BM's. He said I need to use fibre so I've started having a teaspoon in the morning and at lunch and stuck to a half movicol at night.
I've also stopped using the diltiazem, only because I ran out and it's expensive and have started to use a topical steroid when it feels irritated as per surgeons instructions. He said to come back in 3 months if it is still bleeding of which he didn't seem that concerned about. He said there is no fissure and that they are in the lower 4 cm of the anus. I always felt something more like 7 cm in so perhaps I'm feeling another hemmie, not sure. He said that fissures heal quite quickly and that it's very rare for to them have scar tissue when I asked if he could see any scar tissue.
My hemmie got aggrevated during the examination and today was a particularly firm BM and so the hemmie bled a lot. I'm not stressed about it as it doesn't hurt now. I did have 2 slices of bread and a bit of meat yesterday so I was expecting a firmer movement but it's hard not to quickly take some more movicol again. Quite satisfactory to have a proper movement again. I think it helped to know how stretched I can go since doing dilation it meant I stayed relaxed even though it took some time. Had to keep reminding myself not to push though.
My concern is that with lowering the movicol then I am back to loosing weight. Back to my nut butters I suppose. A snack I really like is dates, dried or fresh, stuffed with either pistachio or walnut butter, so delicious.
AF since Jan '15 postpartum
Taking: Lax-sachets, flaxseed oil, Mg
Topical: Diltiazem, Sudocrem
Circulation: Warm wheat bag, relax, short walks
Tried: Rectogesic, slippery elm, Lactulose
hopefull
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Re: As it goes...

Postby hopefull » 18 Jan 2016, 15:05

So I've just got back from holiday. I have been following the surgeons instruction of added fibre and reduced movical like softeners. I've had good days and bad, would have been ok except I probably ate far too much meat while on holiday. Now I am back it will be back to reduced protein and bread and more exercise. I'm determined to start running again this year. I'm pretty sore now, most days I bleed still but as the surgeon said using the bowel properly is more important. Generally though it is sore to pass the motion but 5 minutes afterwards it's not sore. I think the main problem is haemorrhoids rather than the fissure but not sure.
AF since Jan '15 postpartum
Taking: Lax-sachets, flaxseed oil, Mg
Topical: Diltiazem, Sudocrem
Circulation: Warm wheat bag, relax, short walks
Tried: Rectogesic, slippery elm, Lactulose
hopefull
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Re: As it goes...

Postby felix » 07 Feb 2016, 15:40

Hi hopeful, nice to hear from you and glad you are ok.. It sounds like you are having some good days which is great! I too am still having setbacks and pain but think this could be piles too as it is a different type of pain from the sharp AF pain, more of an ache/burn.
I have come to the conclusion that this is something I will have to manage for the foreseeable future and hope one day it pushes off for good!! Take care and I hope you fully heal soon...are you still dilating?
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