Feeling discouraged...

Bad experience with another CRS

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Feeling discouraged...

Postby Luka » 05 Jan 2016, 10:54

Hi everyone,

Well, I saw a new CRS yesterday to discuss possible LIS surgery under general anesthesia, and unfortunately it did not go well. : ( We didn't even discuss surgery since he was more interested in my diet (which is fiber-filled enough as it is and very healthy) and telling me to take Metamucil (1 tablespoon) and 2 Colace daily, as well as Xylocaine ointment. He didn't even offer Nifedipine, which is what I really want to try, since the Diltiazem gives me a rash and itching now. I also asked him about Miralax, but he said it's a laxative and shouldn't be used every day longterm. Guess every doctor has a different opinion about that.

The exam was a disaster. He wouldn't explain what he was about to do beforehand and got extremely frustrated with me because I was so nervous and tight down there. He kept telling me to move my butt to the end of the exam table, which I thought I was doing as I scooted over, but apparently wasn't doing it well enough, so he started yelling at me. He examined the outside only and couldn't see anything because my fissure is internal. I think he wanted to use the scope, but wouldn't tell me if he would or not. Honestly, the fear of the scope was probably driving my anxiety more than anything else because I didn't want to get torn again by it since I'm so tight. The nurse was no help, either, since she was very rude and wasn't willing to do anything to help me other than stand there staring at me.

Then, afterward, he told me I needed to get mental help for my anxiety issues because my behavior wasn't normal and that basically he didn't want to deal with me (not said in his words, but in his behavior, with his constant sighing and clear frustrating in his gestures and voice). He then said fissures are not life-threatening and that it's "only pain," so I should be able to deal with it. At that point, I lost all respect for him since, as everyone knows on this board, fissures are VERY debilitating, even though they are considered "minor" compared to other afflictions.

I was really putting a lot of hope into this CRS because he was recommended by my GP and has 38+ years of experience in the practice. So, I'm really hurt and disappointed at the moment.

Sorry for my rant, but I just wanted to vent after that horrible experience yesterday. I know I'm a very anxious person with an anxiety disorder and need help with it, but I didn't need to be yelled at about it and treated like some kind of nutcase. I know many others on here have had similar bad experiences with doctors, so I don't feel so alone.

In any case, thank you for listening.
January 2013 - Diagnosed with fissure. Eventually turned chronic.
History of IBS and anxiety disorder, along with fear of using bathrooms other than my own caused it.
Tried Diltiazem, but eventually developed a rash.
LIS surgery scheduled August 26th.
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Re: Feeling discouraged...

Postby Savaici » 05 Jan 2016, 14:13

Some of these doctors are just amazing, and I mean that in a negative way. Personally, I would give him a negative review online, so that others don't need to experience the same thing.

I hate going to doctors, get anxious etc., hate new situations, but just won't take it anymore. It's my health and I will be an advocate for it!!! :sunny:

Be that as it may, in the end I 'resorted' to self-dilation, and it was the only thing that helped me. I have IBS, go to the loo sometimes 6 times a day or more. I have just learnt to live with it.

38 years of experience obviously did not teach that CRS a thing about empathy...Sorry it was a lousy experience. As you are in SF, there must be other CRS, with empathy. Also, ask your GP for the Nifedipine. No reason it cannot be prescribed by a GP.
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Re: Feeling discouraged...

Postby felix » 05 Jan 2016, 16:32

How hideous, clearly that is a man who should not be in the healthcare business. I am sorry that you had such a horrid experience and personally I think you should make a formal complaint, nobody should be treated like that when they are in pain and unwell.
Hope you find a decent CRS soon!
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Re: Feeling discouraged...

Postby Luka » 06 Jan 2016, 09:59

Thank you Savaici and felix for the replies.

The CRS has almost all five star reviews on Yelp and a few other sites, so I'm not sure why I had such a bad experience. Sometimes I think online reviews mean nothing or maybe people are paid off to write them. The other CRS I saw in San Francisco wasn't that great, either, but at least she didn't yell at me and treat me like a sub-human because I was anxious. I don't think I will report him, since he's a very popular and respected CRS in the area (and owns the practice I go to out of 4 other CRS's that also work there) and I don't think anyone would care to listen to me or believe me. I'm just going to move on and stick to my old CRS or find someone else eventually if I have the time (and money) to do so. I just wanted to post my experience on here in case others had a similar experience with a doctor so they don't feel they are alone. The experience was very hurtful and I did not deserve to be treated like that.

Savaici - I didn't know you could request Nifedipine from a GP. That's the ointment, correct? I'm not sure he will be familiar with it, though. I will probably make an appointment with him, anyway, since I'd like to request some Valium or other anti-anxiety med for medical exams in the future, in case I need them for a situation like I experienced before (which I hope I never encounter ever again).
January 2013 - Diagnosed with fissure. Eventually turned chronic.
History of IBS and anxiety disorder, along with fear of using bathrooms other than my own caused it.
Tried Diltiazem, but eventually developed a rash.
LIS surgery scheduled August 26th.
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Re: Feeling discouraged...

Postby Savaici » 06 Jan 2016, 21:22

Have a look at this link and its links, and then just mention the strengths to your GP. You have nothing to lose by asking :)

http://www.google.com/search?q=nifepepi ... al+fissure
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Re: Feeling discouraged...

Postby Manitourose » 06 Jan 2016, 22:24

Luka,
I am extremely saddened to hear you had to withstand that sort of treatment. Ugh! That behavior whether it is a medical doctor or not is NOT acceptable care. I had a similar experience with my 1st CRS, who told me I was "anal" at staying clean which was due to my anxiety he stated and personality type.
I was also subjected to a rigid sigmoidoscopy and no exam for a fistula or fissure was properly completed. Turned out I did have a fistula and likely a fissure which was diagnosed with a new doctor. Also a recommended physician from my GP as well. Shame when that occurs!

I'm glad you came here to share what happened but terribly sorry it did. It is so important that these types of doctors give us respect, are gentle and are open to what we share because we know our bodies BEST.

I was prescribed Nifedipine by my GP after I showed him my Diltazem cream. It turned out to be what the compounding pharmacy put together. But he wasn't entirely familiar as a CRS would be, but did look it up and took down the info to call it it. I explained it helped and that I needed a refill since it would take some time to get into a CRS.

I also have an anxiety disorder Luka. I'm always happy to lend an ear as I too get quite anxious going to the doctor. Regardless we all deserve to be treated kindly. Unfortunately some doctors lack this ability!
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Re: Feeling discouraged...

Postby Luka » 07 Jan 2016, 11:18

Savaici - Thank you. I will give it a try. : ) You're right, it can't hurt to ask him about the Nifedipine. Going to make an appointment with him today.

Manitourose - Yes, it was a pretty awful experience and by your experience I can see I am not alone. : ( I went there to get help, not to be berated about my anxiety issues, which is something I cannot help. I'm already taking Prozac for my anxiety and depression, which REALLY does help, but it can't solve everything. The next step would be benzos (Valium, Xanax, etc) and those are highly addicting and should only be taken in times of extreme stress. Needless to say, I really wanted some kind of tranquilizer for that whole situation. It's something I definitely want to forget!

Anxiety and depression runs in my family, as does alcohol and drug addiction, so dealing with this has been a struggle all my life. It deeply hurt me when the CRS told me he couldn't help me due to my mental issues. I'm getting over the experience, but it will take some time before I fully recover from this and try to find someone else (or stick with my old CRS, who seems like a saint now compared to this guy... that's what I will probably end up doing now).

It's so difficult finding a doctor that is highly experienced in their field, yet has a great bedside manner and treats patients with compassion, understanding, and patience. People out there who have found one have no idea how lucky they are.

Thank you all for the helpful support. : ) I really love this board. If anyone out there has had a similar experience with a doctor of any kind, don't stand for it and find someone else. You don't deserve to be treated like dirt just because someone has a medical degree.
January 2013 - Diagnosed with fissure. Eventually turned chronic.
History of IBS and anxiety disorder, along with fear of using bathrooms other than my own caused it.
Tried Diltiazem, but eventually developed a rash.
LIS surgery scheduled August 26th.
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Re: Feeling discouraged...

Postby Fissurefrustration » 12 Jan 2016, 12:11

Hi Luka,

I thought I would put my 5 cents in, sorry it's a bit late!!

I'm a nurse and I look after people with chronic conditions all the time and I know they need a bit more patience and time as they have had the conditions for a long long time. I did my research and found a lovely looking CRS, amazing feedback and a specialist in 'minor + major anorectal conditions and rectal bleed" her photo showed a lovely smiling woman, blond hair and generally looking like a typical mum. her bio said she had 3 kinds, volunteered abroad and has attended multiple studies surrounding colorectal conditions to enhance her knowledge base. I was almost excited to see her and sadly.... like you when I went in to her consulting room she wouldn't even look at me. She was angry when I wouldn't tolerate the anuscope and said this is a minor condition and couldn't understand why I was crying. She was reluctant to do surgery as there was no evidence of my fissure (apart from the blood and pain.... :\ ) and I left the room feeling so upset, angry and lost.

then she went on sick and her medical secretary called me and said she had another doctor who could take over my care. I googled him and there wasn't much information - just an angry looking chap in his late 60's who didn't write anything about himself but I was desperate. When I went to the waiting room he came out and greeted me personally and he was the most amazing caring man I have ever met. He's been looking after me ever since!! I've been so lucky but fate played a big part in my story I think, and I hope things work out for you soon.

If your in the UK I can suggest him if you like!

FF x
Suffering since June 2013

Methods tried:
GTN cream - migraines!
Manuka Honey / Coconut oil / Aloe
tag excision X 2, botox x 3
Dilatiazem
dilatation 2 X daily + Retin-C Vitamin Scar Treatment Oil 2 X daily - best thing ever.
Now pain free 2/7/21
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Re: Feeling discouraged...

Postby Luka » 13 Jan 2016, 12:16

Thank you for your input, Fissurefrustration. I'm sorry to hear about your experience with that CRS. : ( It seems like online reviews sometimes count for nothing when it comes to getting a great doctor. I wonder if many of the bad reviews get taken down (Yelp is infamous for that) or that people who had bad experiences with doctors are just too afraid to post and/or just want to forget the whole experience. The CRS I saw in San Francisco had amazing reviews with everyone saying she was gentle and had an amazing bedside manner, but I didn't find that to be the case at all. She was better than this last CRS, though, who also got great reviews (with people also saying he had a great bedside manner). At least she didn't yell at me and get visibly frustrated like he did. I was excited to try both CRS's, but ended up very discouraged and disappointed in the end. I will be sticking to the CRS I originally went to since I've run out of options here and I don't have much money to work with (no good insurance). No, he's not perfect, but at least he's gentle and somewhat understanding.

I'm really happy you found a CRS that works for you. : ) I live in the United States, but if I lived in the UK, I would definitely give him a try. He sounds like a great guy. All it takes is a little sympathy, communication, and understanding from doctors to make a difficult and stressful experience into a positive one.
January 2013 - Diagnosed with fissure. Eventually turned chronic.
History of IBS and anxiety disorder, along with fear of using bathrooms other than my own caused it.
Tried Diltiazem, but eventually developed a rash.
LIS surgery scheduled August 26th.
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Re: Feeling discouraged...

Postby Shania213 » 13 Jan 2016, 12:45

Hiya your not alone in this. I had a very similar experience recently. I just couldn't let the consultant look inside . I was in sooo much pain and I was scared he could cause more damage.

Im mentally in a better place now so will probably be going back some time soon. I don't have any blood but the spasms and burning are off the scale.

Shania
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