How is everyone doing?

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Re: How is everyone doing?

Postby ButtQueen » 03 Feb 2014, 01:21

Did it yoohoo! I am a female now :)

I read this somewhere, thought I'd share. Gave me strength..

"Three years ago, I was torn out of normal college life when I fell very ill. I ended up spending two months in the hospital as the doctors tried to figure out what was wrong with me. By this time, I had undergone numerous procedures, became severely anemic, and lost a lot of weight. The whole time, I kept thinking I'd go back to school any day now. Finally, my doctor scheduled me for one last biopsy. If this still turned up inconclusive, I would have to undergo surgery so they could get a larger sample and diagnose me. I was so scared because I had never had surgery. More than anything, I wanted to know what was wrong so I could go back home to my own bed.

Until then, I had been to weak to pray standing. I would pray sitting on a chair or in bed but that day, I asked my mom to help me stand so I could pray. As soon as I started praying, I felt this calm feeling wash over me and I knew whatever happened, it would be okay. The next day, I got the good/bad news. Good news: I didn't need the surgery. Bad news: I had cancer. It had metastasized and was staged at 4. I was rushed into treatment right away. Treatment, for lack of a better word, sucked. Despite the amount of physical pain, emotionally I was fine. Despite my oncologists warning that the treatment had a 50% chance of being effective, I never felt afraid. I felt safe, I could honestly feel that God was by my side through it all. And, luckily, I had/have an amazing family that held my hand every step of the way. I think it was harder for them to watch me go through all that than it actually was for me to experience it.

With the mercy of God, I went into remission a year later and it hasn't come back since. Since then, I have become a strong advocate for young adult cancer patients.

When bad things happen to us, we tend to pity ourselves and ask "why me?" The thing is, everyone has dark moments in their lives and it might feel like the end of the world when you're down there, but there is a bigger plan for us. It is in those moments that we learn the most, gain strength and clarity, and find who we truly are. I wouldn't wish cancer on anyone, but had it not been for my cancer, I wouldn't have found my passion. I wouldn't have this oppurtunity to connect to so many under served patients and help them find their own hope."
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Re: How is everyone doing?

Postby woundedspirit » 03 Feb 2014, 09:12

Hi ButtQueen,
Today is going to be a good day thanks for asking! Soft full fluffy BM. That is the goal, fluffy. I have had an anal fissure for 2 years with an unsuccessful LIS. Just wanted to agree with those who are recommending Miralax. I could not live without it. My other most valuable tool is Lidocaine ointment 5% (numbing cream) pre and post BM's. I understand completely every feeling you have described. Staying positive is one of the hardest things to do. This condition tends to leave one hopeless and I think sometimes that is the worst part. Utilize medications that are availabe from your doctor. They really do help! I wish you the best!
Hemorrhoid Surgery
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2 Anal Fissures
Failure of All Topical Treatments
Failed LIS
[size=85]EUA and Fissurectomy
Hoping to avoid Flap Surgery
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Re: How is everyone doing?

Postby Ginger » 05 Feb 2014, 19:35

Wow reading all of your posts...I am new to this site and was about to lose my mind from depression. I have been suffering from a recurring AF for over a year, and the pain the impact on your life. It has had significant costs personally and professionally. I almost hate to say but finding people suffering in the same way gives me comfort...although with what we are all going through there is very little of that. I have been trying to use diltiazem for about 6 months but have mixed results. Dreading the surgery option as the risks seem so big. Would appreciate any feedback
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Re: How is everyone doing?

Postby ButtQueen » 05 Feb 2014, 21:07

Hi Ginger! You have come to the right place :) We all know what it's like having a fissure, which sadly our friends and family don't know lol! Fissures do really suck! I've had it for over 2 months now and it's driving me mental :)

But! But but but Ginger there have been people here who have healed their fissures after having them for more than the time that you have had it, and that too naturally! Do not let yourself get depressed. Remind yourself every time: It's only (!) a fissure, not cancer. It won't kill you dead :) Hope you heal soon and welcome!!!
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Re: How is everyone doing?

Postby ButtQueen » 05 Feb 2014, 21:10

WoundedSpirit I'm sorry somehow I missed your reply. Two years! Gosh, you guys are heroes. I've had it since just over two months and it is driving me nuts to the core. My family is sick of me throwing tantrums and trying to cheer me up all the time lol.
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Re: How is everyone doing?

Postby woundedspirit » 06 Feb 2014, 23:43

No problem! Hope you are doing well today.
Hemorrhoid Surgery
Scar Tissue
2 Anal Fissures
Failure of All Topical Treatments
Failed LIS
[size=85]EUA and Fissurectomy
Hoping to avoid Flap Surgery
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Re: How is everyone doing?

Postby ButtQueen » 02 Oct 2016, 14:56

Hi there everyone! It's been two whole years since I posted this and so much has since changed. I got my psw renewed because I haven't logged in since forever and I had forgotten my password. Anyway, just to give everybody some strength, in these two years I have gotten married, healed naturally from my horrible anal fissure and now 34 weeks pregnant with my first bub. So my message to all of you, stay positive, healing from this thing is real and totally possible. Stay positive and don't lose hope.
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Re: How is everyone doing?

Postby Savaici » 02 Oct 2016, 20:23

Ah, wonderful to Har from you and that you're married and have a baby on the way! :wel: to the soon to be! :baby2:
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Re: How is everyone doing?

Postby averageJoe2000 » 08 Oct 2016, 18:15

Congrat Buttqueen. :) Unfortunately not doing so well here. But i'm trying to keep hope
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