Hey, I'm Jack. Nice to meet everyone.
Two years ago I was on a pretty protein-heavy diet, doing a lot of weightlifting, that sort of thing. A ways in, I started having minor anal pain. A few months along the road and it had become major anal pain, the sort of thing that eventually takes you to a doctor.
So I went to a doctor, got prescribed nitro cream, and it worked wonderfully after a few weeks. A few weeks later, another fissure opened, and for some reason the nitro cream wouldn't touch it.
So after a few months I had botox, and that reduced the pain some over a period of a few months, but eventually did nothing.
After that, I went back for LIS surgery, which seemed to be putting me on the path for full recovery. After a few months I was able to walk more than a few hundred metres without suffering agonizing pain, and things seemed to be looking up.
One day I got the runs (it's easy to change your diet, harder to avoid getting sick at all times), and ended up in crippling pain. I've spent the last few months in bed, and I'm honestly at a loss what to do next.
The doctors are going to take me in for a colonoscopy, but I'm not sure what else they can do. My diet at this point pretty much consists of brown rice, lentils, and vegetables, with plentiful water. My bowel movements aren't especially painful, but the pain the fissure causes me is low-level and constant, and increases when I walk. When I decide to get foolish and prod it (to ensure it's not all in my head, as I sometimes wish), the agony is indescribable.
I used to be an incredibly active person who lifted weights, ran, climbed, and just explored the pretty spectacular wilderness outside of my uni, now I'm a bedbug who sometimes fails units because I just can't focus through the pain.
My entire life has been thrown off track, and honestly I can deal with that if I ever get the chance I put it back on the rails. Not really sure I ever will - at 22 I'm incredibly depressed and figured I'd just appreciate some people to talk to about this whole thing.

Hi jack.... Welcome to the forum... And so sorry you have to be here!
We all understand how depressing this pain gets... It is a constant reminder nagging away down there!
I hope the docs can give you some help once they have seen your colonoscopy results... Things will ease up again.. You just have to hang on in there until they do.

OMB x

Jack,
I'm so sorry to hear about all you have struggled through with your fissures. It is especially disheartening when you've tried all the recommended treatment options offered by your doctors, only to still be dealing with this problem. More than likely your colonoscopy will be normal, but the doctors usually want to rule out other factors when you have recurring fissures.
We all understand how hard it is to cope with this affliction every day for months (sometimes years) on end, and so I hope it helps you to know you aren't alone in this. Even at our very lowest, we have to keep hoping for things to get better. Other than being careful with your diet, are you taking any stool softeners such as Colace or Miralax? These can make a big difference. Also, you might want to be careful going overboard on fiber. Fiber for some of us (myself included) can bulk things up too much and cause more tears.
As OMB says, the best we can do is to hang in one day at a time, keep trying different things, keep hoping, and keep following through on new leads and new directions.
Wishing you all the best, and offering a welcome to this wonderful forum of support and information.