Hi everyone,
I have been reading on here for quite some time, but this is my first post. I'm a 21 year old female. I have had my fissure about 8 months, since September. It has absolutely devastated my life. The enjoyment of my senior year has been completely destroyed by this. I try not to get caught up in it but it's hard to believe that my life will ever be normal again.
It took me quite a while to even see a doctor, due to embarrassment. I always was in that period of time where I aged out of my pediatrician but didn't have a new physician. In January I saw a Gastroenterologist and she did an external exam and told me that I had a fissure. She gave me diltiazam/licocaine ointment. I've been using this with coconut oil. I also do Mirolax, fiber supplements, and stool softeners. Sitz baths after BM to help relieve pain. There have been periods, sometimes a week or two, where I feel 100% okay. But all it takes is one time and I am so devastated that I just wish I didn't exist anymore. This week is one of those weeks. I finally called a CRS I was referred to and scheduled a new patient appointment in two weeks. It took me so long because I don't want to feel like surgery is my last remaining option.
I guess my worry is that I feel pretty uninformed about major surgery in general. Never had surgery before, unless you count wisdom teeth. My mother is unable to go with me to my appointment and I'm unsure of the questions to ask. I'm so terrified. I'm at the point where I just want to give up and have the surgery as soon as possible. Any input is appreciated, I'm just so lost at this point.