So here's the story (I apologize if this is in the wrong place as I just joined, I found this board while googling and it seemed like a friendly, helpful place, so I joined), I'm pretty certain I have an anal fissure but I'm not sure and I can't go to a doctor. I don't have health insurance and I don't have a job so I could only go to a doctor if it was an emergency. I just don't have the money to spare. I just wanted to sort of describe what's been going on to see if it sounds familiar to people who have been dealing with anal fissures.

I'm 19, and a few weeks ago I went out of town to visit some relatives, I have an odd thing where I don't like to use anyone else's toilet for going #2 but my own. Basically I went five days without going and when I finally did, there was a lot of straining, I don't recall if there was pain or not but there was blood. There's been blood twice more since... I didn't check too closely but I don't think it was in the stool, which I know from googling is a warning sign of colon cancer. I think I just tore something and bled as a result. The most recent time there was blood, there was pain for the rest of the day, hours afterward.

Anyway, googling led me to think I've got an anal fissure. But when I check in the mirror now all I can see on the outside (TMI probably, if it hasn't been up to now, I'm sorry) is a sort of dark horizontal line/sort of tear or scar on the outside? Is it supposed to look like that, is that a sign it's healing, or something odd? I'm a highly anxious person and I keep fretting that I've got colon cancer, against all odds, even though the anal fissure makes more sense. Infinitely more sense. But all that I can see outside is what I described and I'm not sure if that's a sign of a fissure or not. I've been taking warm baths and that seems to make me feel better, and I've had some fiber supplements for a couple days and it's not hurt and there's been no blood any time I've gone since.

Anyway that's my story...any advice or comments welcome, apologies if I've goofed up somehow posting this. I can't stop fretting and worrying.

First of all, I'd like to say I'm sorry to hear that you're suffering. Secondly, I'd guess that about 95% of people do not like to go #2 anywhere but home, so you are certainly not odd on that front. Not many would let it go 5 days though, so it's not surprising that you may have caused some damage by doing so.

My fissure was further up the canal, so couldn't be seen externally (and many are like that), but from your description it sounds like it might be one. Only a doctor can make a diagnosis though, so it's really too bad that you aren't covered to see one and can't afford to do so on your own. Can you borrow money from someone to see a doctor? Or perhaps visit a free clinic of some sort? I don't know where you're located, so can't really guess at your options. You mentioned emergency care though, so if the fissure flares up again, could you go to the emergency department and have them take a look?

And you never know, if it is a fissure, it may heal up quickly on its own and you'll be back to normal again soon.

That was a very bad choice of me, and you can bet it won't happen again. Not that that helps now, sigh. As they say though, hindsight is 20/20...

I'm in Texas. I don't know about free clinics but I know I don't qualify for government aid for healthcare and the like due to my age and other circumstances. I'm keeping an eye on things best I can, and if anything unusual happens then I will go to a doctor, cost or no and somehow, but if things stay as they are... I understand from googling that many/most fissures are on the inside, but are any visible on the outside? or is that a sign of something else entirely? perhaps the dark color of the mark is due to healing? like the color a scab gets when it's healing... I hope so.

one way or another, if I never have any bleeding incidents again, then I shouldn't be concerned right? because bleeding is the first sign of pretty much anything serious, to my understanding-via-google. and every time there's been bleeding I think it was always accompanied by at least a little pain (mostly stinging?) and straining, so that's what makes me think it's a fissure.

thank you for your response. I'm glad someone took notice of my plight. :)

I'm in Canada, so don't know much about what you'd be eligible for without insurance in the U.S., but I hope that you can get to a doctor at some point to get a proper diagnosis.

I've definitely read about many fissures on this board being on the outside and clearly visible to both doctors and the patient, so an external fissure is definitely possible.

I would never just dismiss bleeding though, because as you say, it could be something more serious. Only a doctor can give you a definitive answer on that front.

Good luck!

Hey Salamandra,

It sounds to me like an anal fissure. I have never caught sight of my one, so I couldn't tell you exactly what it looks like. But your symptoms sound suspiciously like an anal fissure. If you're not in pain anymore, I would suspect it has healed or is almost healed. They can do that, heal by themselves until they become chronic and then it gets more complicated. I wouldn't worry too much about getting it diagnosed by a doctor, especially if you are on the way to recovery. I have been to the doctor a million times and all they can do is prescribe various creams and give advice about your diet. My advice to you is to avoid passing a hard stool by ensuring you drink plenty of water and make sure you have a balanced diet with enough fibre to allow your stools to be smooth and easy to pass. The best thing for you is to try and avoid constipation which includes overcoming your fear of going in public. The longer you wait to go, the harder the stool becomes as more and more water is absorbed from the stool while its in there waiting to come out.

Hope that helps!