6/24

bm: 8:30am. Between Bristol type 3 and 4. I had the dreaded plug/hard tip. Sigh.Pain of pushing hemmie back: about 3-4. I felt like I probably re-tear a little bit today.

Went to pelvic floor PT today. She said my level 2 pelvic floor muscles are tight. I'm good at contraction but not so good at relaxation. She gave me some breathing and relaxation exercises to do at home.

***

cod liver oil
a few pieces of strawberries, pineapples, grapes, one apricot
1 cap miralax
1 cup soy milk
1 cup coconut milk + smashed sweet potato and pumpkin
bone broth (20g protein), 4 small turkey meatballs, 1 tbsp of olive oil, boiled asparagus and spinach
snack: medjool dates, coconut strips

sitz bath: just a quick and lukewarm one in the morning. will cut back on sitz bath because of vaginal itch for the next few days.

6/25

1st bm: 7:30am. I used an herbal hemorrhoid treatment (comes with one-time use injector) my visiting friend brought from China last night. Only had a little bit of stool. Runny but not quite type 7. Hemmie didn't come out.

2nd bm: 10:30am. after breakfast. a little bit more loose than type 4. Pain of pushing hemmie back: 2 to 3.

3rd bm: this is so unusual. Maybe because I’ve been eating fruit all day and dinner (soup and turkey meatballs and veggie) triggered my digestive system? Very loose. Hemmie didn’t come out.

***

cod liver oil
a pineapple slice, some grapes, two prunes
1 cap miralax in 1 cup coconut water
then another half cup miralax in 1 cup 100% apple juice in fear of bad BM again

bone broth (20g protein), 4 small turkey meatballs, boiled dailkon and spinach, two small kiwis
snack: medjool dates, coconut strips, grapes and strawberries, hummus, two tsb almond butter


sitz bath: none. vaginal area getting itchy lately. stopping sitz bath for a few days.

You may have mentioned it in an earlier post, but do you use any muscle relaxant cream after going for a BM? Like rectogesic or diltiazem? Sorry to hear about the slight retear, I also had that this morning around pain level 5. I forgot how that felt and it sucks.

tightbutt5678 wrote:You may have mentioned it in an earlier post, but do you use any muscle relaxant cream after going for a BM? Like rectogesic or diltiazem? Sorry to hear about the slight retear, I also had that this morning around pain level 5. I forgot how that felt and it sucks.

No I don’t. I got nifedipine from the doctor (which I think is supposed to relax the muscles?) but it does absolutely nothing for me and kind of irritates the wound.

Ah ok! Rectogesic might be worth a try. I have tried everything and it is the only thing that relieves tightness/spasms. I found diltiazem, (which is a calcium blocker), did nothing for me and also irritated the skin.

6/26

1st bm: 7:30am. Bristol type 4. Only about half to 3/4 as much as usual stool? Probably because I went once yesterday evening? Hemmie come out a little bit but kind of snapped back on its own. Pain 2-3.

almost no spasms after bm! my internal hemmie seems to be somehow connected to the fissure site so pushing it back in really upsets the fissure site and sets the spasms in motion. so the less I irritate the internal hemmie, the less the spasm.

2nd bm: 11am. Bristol type 4. (Grhhhh. Why can't I just have one BM a day!) Hemmie came out, pain of pushing back is 2-3.

***

cod liver oil
a pineapple slice, about 8-10 strawberries, one spoonful of hummus
1 cap miralax in 1 cup coconut water

about 1 cup blueberries
1 cup soy milk + 1 cup coconut milk
1 tbsp peanut butter

pig feet soup, 2 scallops, boiled cauliflower, spinach, baked brussel sprouts, 1 kiwi

snack: medjool dates, coconut strips

sitz bath: none. vaginal area getting itchy lately. stopping sitz bath for a few days.

6/27

bm: 6:30am. Bristol type 4. Pain of pushing hemmie back in: 2. Have OBGYN appointment at 9:45 so had to make sure I empty my bowl early.
no hard spasms after bm. just tingly itchy and some tightness (light spasms) - the kind I can still walk with. although i still lied down for like an hour after BM to be comfortable.

I've had a few days of BM of near-perfect texture (timing is a different matter) so I'm sticking to this diet until my wound heals: mostly fruit, veggie + protein at dinner time. I'm doing 16-18 hour fast on most days too, so I eat all my food within 6-8 hour window. my sugar intake is probably too high, but at least fructose is better than refined sugar.

***
cod liver oil
8-10 strawberries, one slice of pineapple, one apricot
1 cup apple juice + miralax
1 cup coconut milk + 1 cup soymilk + coconut oil
pig feed soup, two scallops, cauliflower, two small kiwis, one peach
snacks: 1 tbsp hummus, 1 tbsp peanut butter, dried coconut strips, two prunes, 1 dried fig, 1 dried apricot, 2 dates

***
started applying propolis cream into anal canal with Q-tip since I feel like whatever isn't feeling is right in between my rectum (where suppositories can reach) and the beginning part of my anal canal (where my fingers can reach). I can feel the usual tingly germ-killing new-tissue-growing kind of itchiness when I apply propolis cream that way.

***
also, good news that OBGYN confirmed vaginal itchiness is general irritation, not any kind of infection. at something small to celebrate =)

6/28

1st bm: 7am. Perfect Bristol type 4 stool continues. Pain of pushing hemmie back in: 1.5-2.
post bm: tingly itchy and tightness (light spasms).

I can almost feel the spot where the tissue is still super tender and haven't healed yet, and that's where all the remaining misery comes from. BE PATIENT! IT WILL HEAL.

I've been passing stool with one hand pressing my left bum. It seems to be quite effective at avoiding stretching out the wound and re-tearing it. However, recent perfect stools have all been pinky-finger width. Granted, internal hemmie is occupying some bandwidth there too. It's like I physically cannot pass wider/bulkier stool anymore. Need to deal with scar tissue (i must have a lot, although i don't know where they are, since I don't know what a normal anal canal feels like anymore) and start dilation soon.

2nd bm: around 1pm? just a little bit. Type 4. Pain of pushing hemmie back: 1.5. Light spasms afterward.

***
cod liver oil
7 strawberries, some cherries, raspberries
1 cap miralax + 1 cup coconut water
1 cup apple juice

smashed sweet potato + 1 cup coconut milk + 0.5 cup soy milk + ghee butter

pig feet soup + half box bone broth (5g protein), boiled cauliflower, baked brussels sprouts
two small kiwis, a few red grapes
snack: dried coconut strips, 3 medjool dates, 1 tsb peanut butter, hummus

6/29

bm: 8am. Perfect Bristol type 4 stool continues. Pain of pushing hemmie back in: 1.5.
post bm: tingly itchy and tightness (light spasms).

***

cod liver oil
a big bowl of fruits: strawberries, raspberries, grapes, pineapple
1 cap miralax + 1 cup coconut water
1 cup coconut milk + 0.5 cup soy milk + ghee butter
white fungus sweet soup
2 figs, 1 nectarine, half a mango
pig feet soup + bone broth (5g protein) + 3 shrimps + salad greens, some mushrooms
snack: dried coconut strips, 3 medjool dates, 1 tsb peanut butter, hummus

***

I think I'm still healing? Pain of BM (especially pushing hemmie back) continues to reduce, little by little. Applying cream to fissure site with finger use to irritate that area quite a bit 3,4 days ago, and now both duration and intensity (of the irritation) has reduced. Anus still don't feel normal and I still can't sit, but I'm happy to take any small improvement day after day. Keep at it! BE PATIENT!!!! AND BE KIND TO MYSELF!!!!

6/30

bm: 6:30am. Perfect Bristol type 4 stool continues. Pain of pushing hemmie back in: 1.5-2.
Internal hemmie seems to have shrunk a bit (small grape to chickpea size). Not sure if it has to do with me starting to take Fargelin (Chinese herbal pills for hem problems) yesterday.
post bm: tingly itchiness and tightness. Mostly itchy than hurting. It's now almost an hour after BM, and I have not felt any spasms yet.

***

cod liver oil
1 small apple + 1 pear cooked into a sweet soup
snacks: hummus, almond butter, medjool dates
bone broth (20g protein) + 2 scallops + salad greens
1 big bowl of fruits: strawberries, grapes, two figs
got hungry in the evening. had 1 more fig and 3/4 cup coconut milk

I think it's time for me to phase back into a close to normal (not mostly fruit) diet. I'm eating way too much fruit (and fructose can burden my liver I think?)