Wow!
You have some really understanding men in your life!!!
Why on earth would you need to take pictures of your butt?
I guess it would help you to get an objective view of how things look.
I tend to use one of those magnifying mirrors to apply cream etc, but it just has the effect of making everything look a lot worse, bigger and more gruesome than it maybe is!
My relationship is two years young, so, I hope he understands and well, he tries, but if he hurts me, he feels terrible about it. Also, sometimes I have to say 'no' as Im in pain and he just looks so dejected and hurt, like it dont want him, not because im in pain.
I guess its just a communication thing . . . guess Im not too good at it . . .and neither is he!
Like you all said, this is a real test of a relationship - sickness and in health and all that! I would just feel so bad if I ended up losing a relationship because of this dam bum thing!!!
I guess I just worry like that when it is getting me down . . .:(
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Hi Sadie
Its easy to get down i know ....
You partner sounds a sweetie, he loves you for who you are and i am sure he knows this this isnt forever, just somtimes it feels that way...
You are still healing , give yourself some more time and be good to yourself...
Things will get better !
xx

Hey S - baby - I take pictures because I am kinky LOL - NOT !!!!
Ok - you are new here so you don't know Fissy - no need to get to know me LOL - I am here just to scare people about fissure hell stories ; ).
Anyway - I have to take pictures to shaw doctors what is going on since they alway doubt my symptoms , so I have to shove picks in their face so they would believe me - very, very sad health system we have here - so we have to resort to those kind of things, you know ! Even with pictures in my hand I had to argue yesterday that my bleeding came OUTSIDE of the anus and not from inside - even when my husband 'testified' CRS was still unconvinced - I really wanted to jump and leave the primacies, I wish I was smart enough to do so !!!!!
Hope I explained it well ; ) !

I take photos in to show doctors and also to help document changes.

I think he should be able to handle this setback in your health and it isn't permanent. If he doesn't, then.....
There are other ways to relate to each other sexually. I went almost 4 months without having intercourse with my husband and did I feel guilty? NO! We got through it and figure we have the rest of our lives for it.

Yeah, I guess its not so bad. You know, when it is hurting me and I cant go out and I cant eat much except from fruit and porridge, it just gets me down.
I have to make excuses to my friends not to go out, as to say 'sorry cant make it my split and swollen bum hole is playing up!' just wouldnt go down too well somehow!
I am determined to do everything right and do what it takes to make myself heal - most people do get better dont they?
Whats the percentage of people who dont get better after surgery?
Anyone know?

Sadie,
How long ago did you have your surgery??

I don't know the rates success rates for fissurectomy but with the sphincterectomy rates are in the 90s. Even if you aren't 100% better you should have some improvement with your surgery.

The body seeks homeostasis and is created to heal so you will get better. It is harder to heal the anal area because there is less blood flow and the area is dirty and you have to use it everyday, so it is impossible to keep it sterile and immobilized. Plus we have to sit on our bums and I wonder if that cuts off blood supply and puts pressure on the area.

Sadie - Did you have a fissurectomy or a sphincterotomy?

My husband has offered to look at my bum for me but I turn him down everytime. I think I can see it best with my small mirror and pen light - I do this in a sitting position with the mirror on the floor. It took me a while to find a comfortable and successful position - I love that I can tell you all this weird stuff! :)

I had fissurectomy surgery 5th July, so its been around one month. Is this long enough to see some improvement?
Sphincterectomy sounds scary - like it will give you a massive lose bumhole - eek! not something I want!
I dont go back to see the surgeon till 5th September, because he's on holiday, so I dont know if Im supposed to feel better by now or not.
I have good results from one fissure that was really giving me problems - im just left with a big skin tag - like a pet raisin growing out my butt! I hate how it looks!
(My surgeon promised me it would look like 'a normal little cute button hole,' but no, it certainly doesnt - not yet anyway!!!)
That one seems to be causing me no pain or problems - I had a look and it is closed over - so success!!! Even with the Pet Raisin!:D
HOwever! The other one - at the back, well it wasnt that bad before the surgery, but the surgeon said he would operate on it anyway, as I had had it for over a year. Now it is giving me real problems!
It is a deep open cut that has just opened right up now that the stitches fell out. Its bigger than before the surgery!
I have figured out though that if I sit to do a bm with my legs together and pinch the top of my butt cheeks together, this stops the one at the back opening up. (does anyone else have these strange habits and rituals!?!?!? - If anyone could see me in the bathroom, OMG!!! hahaha):flush:
My family think its rather strange that I keep spending so long in the bathroom now, when they are all so speedy!
My brother just made an amazing curry for dinner too - it smells so good, but there is no way I'm gonna eat it! Its so hard when you are visiting other people to keep to your habits. I worry about offending them.
Lecia, you look pretty in your picture btw! :adorable:

Thanks, Sadie!
Wow-I wish you could see a doctor before Sept 5th. You shouldn't have a gaping wound like you do. Where is home for you? I wonder if you could get a second opinion?

Yes I have all sorts of rituals and routines that keep me going. I have to have lube for my bum before I go, wipes and then rest. I am visiting relatives too so that makes it harder. I just want to eat everything in sight.

Do you take any stool softeners?