Hello everyone!
Well here goes my story about 9 months ago i was constipated, i will never forget that day i had some blood on the stool and paper but thought nothing of it.As the days went by i notice pain and more blood and i knew i was in trouble.I am from U.S. and in my country insurance is not cheap so i have none i hanged in there with 3 weeks of hardcore pain til i went to a local clinic the doctor there isn't too good of course its a 30 dollar per visit clinic in a run down neighborhood but its all i can afford, he told me i had a hemorrhoids without even looking at it. So off i went he told me to use PH creme and get on colace so i did as he said and got very paranoid about every move i made when it came down to eating or anything to do with my butt. The pain got better do to the stool being soft, i notice some days feeling no pain, i worked hard and got my stool and bms down to perfection and for 3 months was nearly pain free....I notice 1 day, lets say i got confident and BAM! it was back with a vengeance i got very badly constapated, all this time i had kept my same routine but somehow got clogged, so i had an enema done and it was a big one not a little one, boy oh boy that was a day of agony.
So i picked myself up and with prayer and patience rehealed by this time i was 95% sure i had an anal fissure not hemorrhoids thanks to the internet and this website.So i was doing good for almost 5 months straight, keep in mind all this time i never have had professional help i do not have insurance and can in no way afford a CRS, i have tried government help but i have been turned down.
So 2 weeks ago i retore i suppose, i haven't seen no blood this time around but the pain is as strong as ever, I really don't know were to get strength to fight this illness no more.I just feel so helpless its like i worked so hard and now im back to day 1. I honestly think this condition will kill me i have lost over 150lbs in the 9 months ive had this thing.Im just in a cloud of pain and depression with no help and to be honest the thought of not living seems very appealing to me these days.
I been reading these forums for a long time and have gotten great information from it, til this day i am not 100% sure i have an anal fissure but i believe i do.Its been a long battle and even though in the 9 months i had many pain free days this thing is hell..I suppose my situation is different because i have fought this fight with no help but now i believe i am loosing the fight and dont think i can refight or reheal this thing.
I have never had a prescription for this, warm baths 2 colace 100mg a day, strictly veggies and water.I have been takeing some prune juice these days but it gets me to watery and it burns like crazy.
Not sure where to go from here friends,I really hate going to sleep just to dread another day of pain.
Thanks for reading please excuse my writing im not the best speller.