jr
Interesting about the estrogen cream...
I will keep it in mind if the current regimen fails.
So sorry you can't pin down the change. What do you do when this happens?
Do you do prune juice?
So many things can go wrong with births. I used to look back and wonder if I did the epidural too soon. Maybe if I could have taken the pain better, I wouldn't have had to have a forceps delivery.
My hubby still wonders if that is why our daughter is mildly autistic. I don't think so though. I think it's just one of the many things that will remain a mystery.
But I knew that darn episiotomy would come back and bite me in the *ss when I got older. I just didn't picture it literally! lol
-woi

Woi...
We could probably all do a lot of looking back and wondering about a lot of things, but really we all make the best decisions we can given what we know at the time and what we can tolerate... Now is now and hopefully armed with what we've been through and experienced we make better choices for ourselves. That's why, even though I am in desperate pain and feeling desperate to do something, I'm still not feeling right about LIS so I still feel like I have to respect where that's coming from inside of me. I've got to break this cycle of pain in another way... I just don't know what that way is exactly...
Is your scar very thick and very far back toward the anal side? I assume you've tried all sorts of things like oils and deep massage? I know there are physical therapists who specialize in adhesions and scars and all the troubles they cause. I was just reading about one group the other day. Might be worth a call just to see if they could provide any information to you.

Oh and about prunes... Never tried em til yesterday. Ate two in the morning and spent the whole day in the bathroom! Yikes! Going to have to be careful with those!

Forgot to get you the link to the PT... They don't specifically list episiotomy but these guys are all about scarring and adhesions... I'd be surprised if they didn't deal with these types of scars too... Looks like you can even do a free consult with a therapist by phone?
http://www.clearpassage.com/

Thanks so much for the Therapist info jr!
I'm feeling a bit better now. I was just going over my calendar from last year and really noticing a correlation from the times my AF bleeds and the end of my period.
Can't think of what it means, but I will definitely ask both my GP and my CRS. Really makes me dread the next monthly cycle though!
It was a pretty extensive episiotomy and it got infected, but even so it's not a terrible scar. But I do remember the muscles down there aching a lot and 'jumping' as it healed and for months afterwards. Now it is just rigid and I actually got those same dilators you use to try and loosen it up. But I don't want to use the same ones for both orifices (jeeze I can't believe I'm talking about this lol!). So anyways. I thought if that went well, then maybe I could be brave enough with the anal dilation...
I just got them in the mail yesterday! Was kinda working up my courage to try them out.
I totally understand your hesitation with the LIS. I mean it would just add the scar tissue. I have started to email around and write down numbers to call, looking for CRSs that do anal dilation. I am in Canada of course, but if worse came to worse, I would fork out from our savings if I thought it would heal me, and go to the states.
I'm going to try and not write on here as much from now on. I think that has added to my anxiety as I think about it all the time!
So I am going to try and set myself some limits.
But I will still check a couple times a day.
Oh yah, what kind of lubricant are you using with the anal dilators?
I sure hope you get some relief soon jr!
-woi

woi...
i agree with you about the anxiety and forums ... On the one hand it can help to feel supported, but there is a tipping point that happens when the mind becomes too fixated. I'm starting to set myself a limit too... Good healthy habits.
I tried the lubricant that came with the dilators. It didn't irritate and I was glad to see it was glycerin free but not happy to see it has a paraben. So I'm going to look for something even safer, especially since I am currently using the dr wheatgrass cream which has parabens in it.
This one has some potential maybe...
http://www.sliquid.com/h2o.htm

the description of this one sounds good too... ingredients for inflammation and promoting skin elasticity ...
http://www.sliquid.com/sea.htm

jr,
I like the sound of the second one.
I was just thinking of using coconut oil..
There's some stuff on the web of couples using it for sex...
what is wrong with parabens and what is a paraben??
-woi

parabens are preservatives used in cosmetics and for quite some time there has been some concern about their safety given that they seem to exert some estrogenic effects in the body. In small amounts the FDA position is that there is nothing to worry about. But if you consider the number of products a person might use in a day that contains parabens from shampoo and conditioner to body washes to body and hand lotions, cosmetics, hair styling products, etc., it can add up in a day. Recent research has found increased levels of parabens in breast tissue of women with breast cancer. It doesn't mean the parabens caused the breast cancer obviously, but it has made some companies, particularly those with a natural or organic emphasis reformulate many products to remove parabens. I don't go crazy over it, I just would rather limit my exposure, particularly with my endometriosis which is very estrogen sensitive.

Thanks jr,
Makes sense to be cautious. I know it doesn't take much to throw off my hormones. I have to be careful of supplements because of that.
-Tanya