Hurtin...the choice is not the one you mentioned in your previous post...it is now between staying with the public system or going private -- sounds to me like you already know the direction you should go in...do me a favour, pick up your phone tomorrow and make an appointment with the private doc and tell them you need to see them within the week...not two.
You are a tough son of a gun...no way I would have lasted two weeks of spreading my cheeks and having someone stick something up there. I am no expert on what you are doing but here is a thought...perhaps your body is telling you to stop or slow down that method. Sometimes we all ignore our body's messages...perhaps the message is that you need to be more gentle. I know the feeling of wanting to suck it up and deal with the pain if it will result in success...only you will be able to really tell what your body is communicating to you.
I also understand the desire to throw out the "kit" of s#*t. No worries, you can replenish all of it easily...it is good to vary your approach to solving this issue because it is dynamic and will change with your body, what you are eating, your mental state etc. don't see throwing out the kit as a defeat of that method...just some justified frustration.
Pls call your private doc and let me know when your appt is scheduled for.
Best,
Canadabum

...and buddy, you are not venting...we are All here for each other so always let us know what is going on.

Finally...I personally developed a liking for bourbon when my fissure was intolerable...a shot or two a day...not so bad eh.

That's perfectly Ok to come on here to speak what's on your mind. That's one reason why we are all here. I am so sincerely sorry to hear all of this. will the people who made you worse refund your money? The longest in a day I was in horrible pain was 10hours, so 24/7 pain, I can't even imagine.

So sorry to hear that things are going in the wrong direction for you. I hope the private Doctor can find a way to help you and FAST. You have suffered for far too long already.

Have you made an appointment yet hurtinend??

You never have to appologise for expressing your sadness and frustration on here.... We all feel it ....... I only hope you are feeling stronger today.

OMB xxx

This approach will help in the end. I had a fissure which brought me to tears every mornig during BM and this clinic healed me in 3 weeks! Best of luck!