Hi Anne,
I have heard terrible things about athletes foot creams. I seriously wouldn't try that!
I think your doc was probably talking about nitro. There are also calcium chanel blockers like nifedipine. They aren't good if you have low blood pressure though.
I wouldn't recommend diaper rash cream either.
If you feel you need to put something on it, I would stick to something more gentle like Virgin coconut oil (at the grocery store), or aloe vera gel (the kind that doesn't contain alcohol!), or lanolin (the kind they sell to breastfeeding moms).
Zinc oxide is a mild astringent and will likely irritate more after a couple days. It also makes it difficult to keep the area clean.
Speaking of clean, a peri bottle and/or baby wipes (alcohol free) might be good to get at the store too.
An electric heating pad will be your best friend for getting the muscles down there to relax.
Some people find putting a little pretoleum jelly on their af before a BM helps reduce 'friction' and everything slides out easier.
I don't do stool softeners, but the one most prefer on this site is miralax.
I like to do metamucil twice a day and a glass of prune juice in the evening. (I actually like the taste :) )
It's real important that you get your BMs soft enough so that you don't have to push at all. Your automatic muscles down there should do all the work. So think 'toothpaste' consistency.
Hope this helps, and you heal quickly!
-Tanya