Becsbum - Do you still feel the pain? try sitz bath and warm baths. It helped me a lot. Are you done with your post-op visit? I am not in too much pain, but still it is running behind my mind that I had blood in my stool. I am unable to enjoy with my baby :-( its depressing. I hope things will get better soon.

Most of the time I would call it irritation at this point rather than pain. It is worst if I sit for too long. You are right- warm baths are great! They help a lot. I honestly think I work myself into feeling worse when I worry. A glass of wine in the evening helps with that! :) I do get very anxious and depressed, like you, but I am trying to change that. Go snuggle your baby!! Oh and yes, I had my post op and she said I am healed (this was a couple weeks ago so I do worry something could have changed since then).

Its good to hear the fissure has healed. But if you think something is wrong, check with your doc once. It could be irritation from your incision. I am feeling better today as I did not had any blood in my stool. I hope things will get back to normal. I am taking Colace since 3 days and I want to stop that and do not want to depend on them. But a little scared to stop. As I feel that my pain is healing and if I stop, I might get hurt again. I am enjoying with my baby :-)

So a little update... I've been using diltiazem for the last five weeks and the retear seemed to be healing. But all it needed was just one big poo to tear it again. Well I didn't actaully feel it tearing but now I do feel the fissure is still there. It's not very big or painful but just the fact that I can feel it this long after the surgery is making me miserable:( I dont' know what to try anymore...
It's weird because I can't see this fissure with a mirror. I do see the sking tag from where it used to be. Also I can't feel anything when I put on the diltiazem and try to feel the fissure with my finger. I don't feel anything not even any burning. But when I stress the muscle I do feel a sting and there's a little"feeling" there all day. Is it possible that I feel a fissure that's really not there anymore? :/

Aimonaali - I think it is possible for the nerves to send the wrong signals, telling you there is pain when there is nothing there. I believe that is happening with me. That said, I also think it is hard to see if a tiny fissure is there or not without having a doctor look (but I understand why you would be hesitant to do that!). Since it seemed to heal up with the medicine, maybe continue with that for a bit longer - if it is a tiny tear it should go away. If it doesn't, maybe get it checked out to see if the doc can see anything.

From what you describe, it doesnt sound like you have retorn. If you had re torn you would certainly feel stinging, especially when putting the diltiazem on.
When ever I was abit uncertain if i had torn, putting diltiazem on would be a pretty good indicator, as i would feel stinging.
Judging from your posts, you are about 4 months out of surgery? My advice to you would be to try your very hardest to stop stressing. Stop checking with a mirror, stop stressing to muscle to test it, try to relax. Drink plenty of water and eat plenty of fibre, that is all you can do.
I had surgery about 8 months ago, it didnt work. It was disappointing and i got quite down, but after a while i learnt not to let it dominate my life, and I was able to cope alot better. There is nothing you can do other than be patient, and try to ignore it. I know sore it can be, but the more you stress, the worse the pain feels. Try to put your energy in to different things. When I used to tear i would spend the week moping about, but eventually i forced myself to push on through and carry on doing things to distract my mind, and it helped alot.
If you are pain free, I would look at that as a good thing. You are still relatively fresh out of surgery, and i would say its natural that you still have odd feelings or sensations down there. Dont let it get you down, just be pleased that you arent in alot of pain, and continue to remain patient.
And if you still continue to feel discomfort in the next few months, see your doctor. If you still have a fissure, whilst its dissapointing, and trust me I know, it is not the end of the road.
I have just had my second LIS, and this time the muscle does feel a lot more relaxed, so i am confident this time it will work.
So aimonaali, RELAX.

Yeah, I know that I should try not to think of it and relax. That would also be good for the healing. I'm just one of those guys to whom nothing is right if everything isn't right:P I was thinking maybe going back to the doctor to get a some rectogesic since it worked with me better than diltiazem. I should have asked it last time but I didn't think this healing would be so difficult.
A couple of weeks ago I did still get some burning when applying diltiazem but that's now gone, which is probably a good sign.
Andyk123 keep us posted about your recovery from the secon LIS. It would be very interesting to hear how you're doing.

Andyk - such good advice! When I get stressed (about anything) I can literally feel it there! And supposedly my fissure is gone! I am working on that. Glad to hear your second LIS seems better so far. That's great news!

So now I do feel a little burn when I apply diltiazem and the sting from the fissure seems to be getting worse... So I'm gonna go back to my doctors tomorrow. Not sure if I'm gonna let him actually do the examination since it tore me up the last time. But I will ask him some questions and also ask him to describe some Rectogesic to me.

I went to the doctor on tuesday. He said that he doesn't really know why the firssure has re-teared after it was supposed to have healed. It's been almost six weeks since the tear and even though it's not really painful it doesn't seem to be better either.
I was given diltiazem and rectogesic for the next couple of months and hopefully that will do the trick. Even though the doctor said he can't promise full healing. So basically I'm in the same position I was one year ago before I had had my surgery. I feel extremely disappointed.