Oh no Hun, that must be so down heartening for you, are you having hard BMs?
Gosh that's so bad walking has always eased mine which was why I got scared for the few days it was uncomfortable. Do you think maybe the oestrogen cream may be increasing blood supply to the area so you are getting more blood? Maybe it's all part of the healing process. No you are not a cry baby no way you are dealing with an ongoing chronic issue with strength compassion and kindness to others...that is not a cry baby.
Can you have a third LIS as I know the LIS is my light at the end of the tunnel.
Have you tried kefir or cloudy lemonade to make BMs softer.
Big hugs I know you can get through this x

Thanks MPB - your cheers for me just made me tear up, means a lot.
Yes as the hours pass my pain is getting better and I am slowly pacing the garden in the bright sun. Reading your post made my day.
Missed my boss's retirement event today which was planned for weeks but will make it up to her.
Was told third LIS is not advisable.
Still maybe 2nd Botox is an option.
Take it easy girl.

Awww Hun I truly believe that only someone who has experienced this can appreciate the mental as much as physical toll this takes. We live in fear expectation and sometimes hope about an act in our lives that we have to do and cannot avoid...it's such a strange position to be in. It also impacts on the ones we love.
Ah I didn't know if they would do a 3rd LIS as I heard your sphincter tone can go back up over time. A second Botox is always an option as the Botox has made dome difference and will probably continue to improve. Hope you had a good day today with less bleeding and pain
Take care

I will cautiously say I had a better day I am not reading anything into it . All liquid diet helped me yesterday maybe. Today I ate apples they are supposed to be good but I think I am going to pay for them tomorrow. Also skipped estrogen cream last night as I looked back at my diary and noted things got worse after I started it. That doesn't mean anything of course - all circumstantial ? I can still feel fissure dearest lurking around with every step I walk . Oh well. Till mañana.

Glad you had a better day, yes I can imagine a liquid diet would make things easier and I guess if you can tolerate smoothies and soups it's not all that unhealthy...if I tried a smoothie...shudders to think lol.
Maybe leave the cream then unless it's one of those that go for the making it worse before making it better approach.
There is so much guessing involved with these things that it really can drive you insane lol
Hope today is a better day for you
Take care

Yes it's a lot of detective work. Had a decent day a little blood and a little pain still with BM but ok with the ability to sit and walk . I am officially 1 month from Botox today despite all my setbacks I still feel better than before it. I am faaaaar from healed and may even need other things done to help me along the way but life is better as every level down on pain scale matters immensely for the day to days. My patience has grown tenfold since D1 of Botox and I understand better what the waiting game means - lots of hard work/ discipline and patient elimination of what doesn't work and inclusion of what does - at the same time keeping expectations very low . Slow and unsure. Sigh . Best to all. Special thanks to MPB for following me everyday I have made a diary entry :). End of month 1.

Congrats on the 1st month and glad on the whole that it's has been positive for you. Yes every level down is a great success for us. Oh yes if there is one thing fissures teach you...apart from the real meaning of pain...it's patience. Good luck with your continuing journey I am sure you will achieve healing, even if you do need a something else done.
You are very welcome it has really helped me to have someone on the same timeline as myself and your caring and understanding has comforted me many times.
Here's to month 2 may it bring more healing and less pain x

Survived a 15 hours work day. Sore after but I will live. Managed to drink a lot of water despite work and take my magnesium, colace, miralax and fiber - just stashed up on them at work.
Bearable pain with BM and after. Still blood tho. Doing reasonable and not expecting too much.

Wow HTD 15 hours...not sure I could do that, what do you do?
Well done for getting all your supplements in very organised. Glad the pain is bearable...maybe the blood isn't a bad sign. I used to bleed quite a lot but since the pain of the fissures started I very rarely bleed at all which is confusing.
Glad your doing a bit better.
Have a good weekend
Take care

Yes it's been a not too bad weekend. My in laws live an hour away so we went to visit and I took my dog for a walk longer than usual. Cooked and cleaned a lot and am still sitting :) without much pain . Staying true to fruit and lentil only. It's tempting to eat other stuff but so far I have been loyal. Makes me have soft BM but smallish. Also makes me stay hungry ( a little) most of the day but all the better I think. Measured my weight today and down by 8 pounds which I think I am fine without. Best wishes, HTD