HELPPP PLEASE VERY DEPRESSED!

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HELPPP PLEASE VERY DEPRESSED!

Postby Rachael 1984 » 13 Feb 2013, 10:15

Image I am beyond words or sanity at this point in my life! I have been suffering with Anal Fissure i think now for 8 months. I had hemorrhoid banding done and the CRS said he could see a fissure. Was given Rectogesic to try and heal(This was last Sept) the side effects were awful, so switched to xyloproct and proctosedyl. Got desperate, as i thought it had healed, but came back with a vengeance in Dec. Tried Rectogesic again, stool softeners, diet, have lost a stone with all of the routine.I am now under CRS who on examination has revealed i have 2 Fissures now. Oh lord, it is taking over my life, no work, crying at partner(Who is getting annoyed). I would rather pass in my sleep than suffer this pain! I have even visited the train track and contemplated throwing myself off in front of a speeding train. no one understands the pain. I have Botox scheduled for 4th April, which is ages away!!! I cannot begin to describe how this is taking over my life. I also have vaginal soreness, which isn't thrush. I have visited a gynae, just waiting on results, he then suggested that i may have a fistula!!!! Bought me down even more. I am having burning all day and knife pains!! Doc has given me painkillers which i am scared to take, as they can cause constipation!!! EEK. Sorry this is so long, but i need to connect with people who understand!!!
Hem Banding sept 2012
2Fissures
Nitro- Effective short term
April 2013-Botox-Effective short term
Diltazem-No effect, developed Rash
July 2014-Diagnosed High Resting Pressure
LIS performed on 17.9.14
Ongoing pain/re-tears. Awaiting pressure test results.
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Rachael 1984
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Re: HELPPP PLEASE VERY DEPRESSED!

Postby Mamalucia » 13 Feb 2013, 11:41

A lot of us understand your pain and despair. Image While dealing with this is terrible please dont continue feeling that ending your life is the way to go! With surgical intervention it will get better! id call around and try to find a CRS who can see you sooner ! explain that this pain is beyond unbearable and you absolutely can not wait!!
what have you tried as far as diet? There is a section on here with a lot of tips for diet...foods to try, foods to avoid ect..that may offer some relief.
As for the painkillers...they may offer relief of some of the pain just be sure to eat and drink things that will prevent the constipation.
I wish I could be more help but if u need someone to vent to u can PM me I'm on this site every half hour/ hour and will lend an ear whenever you need it!!
Last edited by Mamalucia on 13 Feb 2013, 11:42, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: Typo
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Re: HELPPP PLEASE VERY DEPRESSED!

Postby owmybum » 13 Feb 2013, 13:47

Firstly, I'm so sorry you are suffering so much... It really feels like the pits and that there is no way out, but with care and time things will start to ease up.
Can you take neurofen? I find this helps to take the edge off, and it's non constipating.
Are you using any type of stool softener? I was using lactulose for ages, but have recently switched to movicol, and I find this is much better at keeping bms consistently soft. You must drink plenty when taking any type of softener or fibre supplement to keep things soft.
A nice relaxing warm bath after a bm is good for relaxing and soothing for pain. Have as many as you can a day.. Some on the board have sitz baths, but I just soak in the tub.
Before a bm put a blob of Vaseline on your anus. It just helps to lubricate things and makes the first wipe glide and not pull. Then use wet wipes or wet cotton wool/tissue to clean up.
Try to take it easy.. One day at a time.. Be kind to yourself and try and stay positive.
Image
OMB x
fissure after hem banding and tag removal feb 11
Pelvic floor therapy
Diltiazem
Botox June 13
Nitro
Internal flap July 14
EUA and polyps removed Nov 14
Diagnosed with neuropathy Jan 15
Diagnosed with HS EDS type 3 (causes poor wound healing )
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Re: HELPPP PLEASE VERY DEPRESSED!

Postby Rachael 1984 » 13 Feb 2013, 14:15

Hi to both of you! Thanks for the replies. I have IBS so constipation started these demons! I am on macrogol softener, which was working great with the rectogesic. But now I have stopped the Rectogesic I am in real pain! Have been on the softener for 2 months. It does seen to work well, but one hard BM started the nightmare pain again. The incessant burning is the worst. I am in the uk Mamalucia, so i am waiting on the NHS for my appointment! I am doing the baths, no red meat, junk food, spicy food, plenty of water. I feel like this is never gonna end! How can these devils cause so much misery! Wish I had never strained! I feel like this is all my fault! I am going to take the painkiller now to see if it makes any difference. Image
Hem Banding sept 2012
2Fissures
Nitro- Effective short term
April 2013-Botox-Effective short term
Diltazem-No effect, developed Rash
July 2014-Diagnosed High Resting Pressure
LIS performed on 17.9.14
Ongoing pain/re-tears. Awaiting pressure test results.
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Rachael 1984
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Re: HELPPP PLEASE VERY DEPRESSED!

Postby Rachael 1984 » 13 Feb 2013, 14:33

Sorry, forgot to ask! Do you take the stool softener at night? I take the one before bed, was maybe gonna try and take it straight after eve meal? I have tried prune juice as well, but with the IBS I am them scared of having the runs! I didn't realise I wasn't going properly either.
Hem Banding sept 2012
2Fissures
Nitro- Effective short term
April 2013-Botox-Effective short term
Diltazem-No effect, developed Rash
July 2014-Diagnosed High Resting Pressure
LIS performed on 17.9.14
Ongoing pain/re-tears. Awaiting pressure test results.
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Rachael 1984
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Re: HELPPP PLEASE VERY DEPRESSED!

Postby Mamalucia » 13 Feb 2013, 15:41

Hopefully they get your appt figured out soon!! Fingers crossed that the painkillers help! You said that the softener you take worked well with the rectogestic, but u stopped the rectogestic...may I ask why u stopped if it helped? U may have said it and I missed it but I was just wondering. As for when to take a stool softener everyone is different and some take multiple a day, try taking them at different times to figure out when it works best for you. Having IBS makes the situation a bit more tricky. Did you try running a search through the forums search bar cross referencing IBS and some of your concerns? A lot of people keep daily diaries on this forum and one may have a similar situation with you.
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Re: HELPPP PLEASE VERY DEPRESSED!

Postby Rachael 1984 » 13 Feb 2013, 15:58

Hi, I stopped the Rectogesic after 8 weeks because Doc and CRS said that was maximum usage time. So now I am stuck! Have tried coconut oil a few times, but I think the Chronic AF is past that. Will look and search for users with IBS. Thanks xxx
Hem Banding sept 2012
2Fissures
Nitro- Effective short term
April 2013-Botox-Effective short term
Diltazem-No effect, developed Rash
July 2014-Diagnosed High Resting Pressure
LIS performed on 17.9.14
Ongoing pain/re-tears. Awaiting pressure test results.
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Rachael 1984
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Posts: 1133
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Mood: Please heal!

Re: HELPPP PLEASE VERY DEPRESSED!

Postby CrackinUp » 13 Feb 2013, 16:12

Did the Rectogesic stop the spasms but you didn't heal?
How did you feel after 6 weeks? I'm interested because I'm 2 weeks in and feel almost normal.
I read somewhere that you can actually buy it from another country... but the shipping is expensive.
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Re: HELPPP PLEASE VERY DEPRESSED!

Postby Rachael 1984 » 13 Feb 2013, 16:17

Hi Cracking up, great name, that is how I feel! Yes it seemed to stop all pain, had a great run on it. But now I am on pain scale 8-10 most days. On painkillers and stool softener. I am having Botox in April. Some people do heal on the Rectogesic, so keep it up. I think mine is past conventional treatments now. Xx
Hem Banding sept 2012
2Fissures
Nitro- Effective short term
April 2013-Botox-Effective short term
Diltazem-No effect, developed Rash
July 2014-Diagnosed High Resting Pressure
LIS performed on 17.9.14
Ongoing pain/re-tears. Awaiting pressure test results.
User avatar
Rachael 1984
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Posts: 1133
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Joined: 12 Feb 2013, 17:00
Location: UK
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Mood: Please heal!

Re: HELPPP PLEASE VERY DEPRESSED!

Postby Rachael 1984 » 13 Feb 2013, 16:21

Add on.. Don't think my doc will prescribe it again unless I hold a gun to her head! Lol which I could quite happily do, a stretch in prison might Heal my butt with all the sloppy food! Are you in US? I am uk, could buy it from Canada or US, have looked at this, but not sure on costs! And side effects from using it for so long!???
Hem Banding sept 2012
2Fissures
Nitro- Effective short term
April 2013-Botox-Effective short term
Diltazem-No effect, developed Rash
July 2014-Diagnosed High Resting Pressure
LIS performed on 17.9.14
Ongoing pain/re-tears. Awaiting pressure test results.
User avatar
Rachael 1984
Moderator
 
Posts: 1133
Topics: 26
Joined: 12 Feb 2013, 17:00
Location: UK
Has thanked: 1 time
Been thanked: 60 times
Gender: Female
Mood: Please heal!


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