Well ... I had to jinx myself didn't I! Today was a bad day!
First BM was just a little bit too firm, and accompanied by that old familiar feeling - that about to tear feeling, which was quickly followed by that actual tear feeling.
I can't believe it! I thought the LIS was supposed to stop me tearing back there. Before I even had the BM I could feel that enormously stretched feeling again. It felt like it was about to tear, and then it did. There was pain and some blood.
I got on the phone to my CRS right away and she said I could come to see her. When I climbed onto the table and spread em’ she had a look and said that everything actually looked pretty good.
We had a chat, and I told her that, of course, my main concern at this point, was that the op had been unsuccessful. She said that the LIS had fixed the problem with the spasming sphincter muscle, but that we still needed to get that troublesome fissure to heal. She said that this was not a sign that the op had not worked. Of course, I knew that the op wasn't going to be an instant fix, but I thought (I suppose naively) that I would be free of this re-tear business right away. I guess I was wrong! She gave me some glycerin suppositories to use before BMs and said that I just had to be really kind to the area until the fissure closes. She said that could take a couple of weeks, but I know from peoples experiences here, that it might take a bit longer than that.
Despite her reassurances, I’m worried! As of today, I feel the same (physically and emotionally) as I did before the surgery. God, I hope she’s right about this!
Sorry to be so doom and gloom.

Sphinct,
I just read about the horrible eartquake at Christ Church. I think you are far away from there, right?? Does NZ frequently have earthquakes???
Trying to have just the right kind of BM can be so maddening!!

Yeah Sphinct, I read about the earthquake too and thought about you.
I'm glad you could get into the CRS, and I'm glad she didn't see anything alarming. You've gone through the hard part, the LIS, and I hope that it is just a matter of time before you are healed up....even with your ups and downs. Remember to look at things week-by-week. Hang in there, and maybe adjust your diet a bit to stay on the soft side??
You're not eating burritos, are you?

Hey Sphinct,
Sorry to hear about the trouble with the bm's. Don't get discouraged! Remember CallMeCrazy and many other(Jen) boardies had some re-tearing and healed with their LIS.
I can imagine it is very disappointing though. Just stay strong and know that you are in the best position to heal this now without the spasms.
Ps... Don't eat the burritos, Lol
No food is worth butt pain!!

Awww....I also thought about you when I saw the earthquake news...sorry you're not having a good day.
It's bound to get better though, I just know it is...it has to.

Hey guys,
No, I'm not near the earthquake region. I do have family down there though. So far as I know, all but one is safe and well. My Aunt sustained a head injury when she was thrown against a wall during the quake. That's all I know. I'm not sure how bad it is. Hopefully I'll hear more today. Communications aren't up and running in certain areas yet, so it could be a while. Also, a friends business was completely destroyed, but everybody made it out of the building okay.
Cheryl - Yeah, NZ gets its share of earthquakes. The country sits on the edge of the Pacific Tectonic Plate and is at the southern tip of the so-called 'Pacific Ring of Fire', which is area of extreme seismic and volcanic activity stretching the entire border of the Pacific Ocean.
So it's definitely a seismically/volcanically active area! Most of the quakes in the region aren't noticeable, but many are.
Auckland, where I live, is generally a little more 'still' than Canterbury (where the quake was), but everywhere you look in Auckland, you can see evidence that in the not at all distant past - Things were very different. Volcanoes everywhere! You practically can't go a mile without walking into one!
See ... I do remember something from school!
:D
BB – Thanks, and sadly, no, I haven’t had a tasty, delicious, glorious buuuritoooo yet. Stupid body just can’t make up its mind … Firm … Soft … Firm … no, Soft. Baaah, it’s exhausting!
Glad to hear your appointment went smoothly and without too much pain. You must be pleased it’s over! By the way, your avatar is beautiful. For that kind of scenery, it would almost be worth the sub zero temperatures!
Hey Dawn! Thanks, I’ll have a proper look at Jen’s and Callmecrazy’s stories. For some reason, I just really thought that the re-tears would be stopped dead by the surgery. Whatever I have to do though … I’ll do it. I’ve come this far after all!
Alpine – I’m glad your appointment went well. Do you know when your surgery will be?
I used a Glycerin suppository this morning, as instructed by the CRS – to soften things up. Well, it was like using an enema. A kind of ‘big red button’ evacuation of the bowels. So now I’m worried that I won’t go for a day. It was a little awkward and painful to insert too!
Oh well, I’m off to have a soak in the tub.
THANKYOU, THANKYOU, THANKYOU ALL!

Sphinct,
Have you lived your entire life in NZ?? You probably recall that we had been scheduled to go to Australia/NZ for a month in 2007, but had to cancel because of my butt issues at that time!

So many people have posted about setbacks immediately following surgery, that I'm just going to expect it after mine is done. No, I don't know yet when it will be....I thought I'd get to schedule it while I was in the CRS's office today, but I have to wait for them to call me back for some reason.
I think Dawn's advice of looking at things a week at a time, rather than day to day, holds true.

Hey Alpine, is that a car in the river of your avatar???! I love it!
Yes, the low temps are almost worth that beauty - in fact yesterday was looking very much like this picture (which was actually from February last year). A freezing fog comes in the morning and coats every single needle on the trees and then the sun comes out. Lovely.
The pictures from the earthquake look awful, so I hope your friends and family are all well.
Sphinct, hang in there with your butt and keep doing all the good things you know how to do - the baths, the water, and eating on the straight and narrow path. Are you doing some good things for yourself, so that you can relax your mind (and sphincter) a bit? Hope so!

Hey,
Cheryl - Yup, I'm Kiwi, born and breed. I actually lived in Christchurch (earthquake zone) for a while when I was a kid. It was a great place to live, I was really happy there. Such a shame! Do you think you'll ever revisit the idea of travelling to Australia and NZ?
I think it is wise to expect setbacks post surgery. Honestly, I'm not sure what I expected. I didn't think too much about the part of recovery that comes after the acute phase. I was just so focused on getting through the initial part, which I expected to be pretty bad. Those first few days weren't actually that bad ... Don't get me wrong ... I didn't have fun or anything, but it was not awful like I expected it to be. This phase of recovery seems worse to me. I did have a read of some of Jen's story though, and that made me feel a little more secure. Even if it is slow going, it should heal up eventually ... I can do that!
Right now, I'm concerned about tomorrow morning. I can't decide if I should use a Glycerin suppository again. It was very unpleasent this morning. It was just like using an enema. The CRS said that they would be good for 'just softening up the fist part of the bowel motion', but it did a lot more than that! She prescribed x1 a day for 14 days ... Ugggh, no thanks! Does anybody have any experience with these things?
By the way, I got word about my Aunt today ... She's fine. Just a bump on the head. Nothing too serious.
Every member of my family living in Christchurch has said the same thing about the quake - Absolutely terrifying! There had been a quake in September last year which was a magnitude 7.1. This one was a 6.3, but much shallower and centred very close to the city, so apparently the shaking was much, much worse this time.
They are all still very frightened as they have had some really big aftershocks. They are all terrified of what's next. Apparently, many have left, or are trying to leave the region, but the roads are badly damaged, so it's difficult. My family all plan to stay put, but at this point none of them have water, sewage or power so I suppose they may have to leave if those services aren't back on soon.
Thanks guys!
Mind over buttocks!
:D