Hi MPB, sorry to hear you are struggling. I know what you mean about trying to focus on life. These problems we're having do seem to take over, and I can see you have had the worst luck and have been suffering more than most.

Seems like a lot of people are active for a while, and the go back to their lives, and then resurface. This is only natural I feel. I think this forum is some sort of solace when people have nowhere else to express their frustrations lol.

Hope things improve for you.
Take care, LemonMan

GI doctor said my fissure was healed but the discomfort due to some scar tissue and nerve endings. Gave me lidocaine 5% and OTC recticare 5% to keep it moist. Seems to help some but pain level comes and goes 1 to 2. No problems passing stools using medicated wipes. Put me on a high fiber diet plenty of water. Able to function but still deal wirh minor discomfort and only when sitting. 3 month update post LIS and others have said could take many months to be normal. I will take tge good days when tgey come and the moments of no discomfort. Progress but not clear. Better than nothing I guess

Hi LM
I would say I'm having more good days than bad as my bowel seems able to behave for 5 days at least and sometimes up to ten days but then I will have 2 or 3 days of serious pain again.
Yes I will not have this dictate my life I will still do everything I did before as long as I don't have spasms...as for food well heck I will never return to eating how I used too but then again if I hadn't ignored what my bowel did and didn't like I may never have got this in the first place so now I listen to it and I eat what my colon likes not what I enjoy lol
I will always come on here to see if I can help others but was worried that my diary could be disheartening as there was no happy ending so to speak and that is the very last thing I would want to do. But this forum helped me in my darkest hours so don't think I could ever leave lol.
Jim really glad to hear that your fully healed and are only experiencing residual scar pain which I'm sure will disappear entirely over the next few months.
I still have hope that one day the pain will become less no matter how often I go to the toilet and if that does happen I will be shouting it from the rooftops lol
X

Oh I totally understand your frustrations mbp. Even if you don't feel like posting, feel free to PM me anytime. I'm pretty much at the same stage - I don't want to post too much negativity, and sometimes it is good to just try and forget that you're dealing with this damn thing at all. But it is so awesome to be able to come here for advice and comfort, or even just to rant to some people who really actually understand what hell you are going through.

-hugs
GG

Thanx GG
Yes your so right being able to talk about it with others who understand is a life saver. I couldn't have coped without our lovely friends on here.
Had a lot of pain last night even though my BM didn't hurt but I do have a very bad cold and am constantly coughing and sneezing so think that may have aggravated something
Here's hoping for better days x

Sorry to hear you've been struggling with a cold, mpb. As I think I mentioned I had a cold last month and the coughing and sneezing wrecked me, in fact I'm still trying to get back to where I was before a month later...so frustrating!

So did you see you CRS today, and if so did he have any good news for you...?! Here's hoping things are looking up for you...

Take care
Mr F

Hi Mr F how's you
Yes this damn cold has not been kind to my butt lol. I'm actually trying so hard not to cough it's silly.
Well yes I saw my CRS who says I'm 90% healed and that the pain after multiple BMs will probably always be there as the fissure site and also now the op site will continue to be irritated by lots of acidic BMs, so he has given me a couple more needs to experiment with.
He actually did agree that advancement flap for someone with out of control BMs could cause more harm than good
So yes I'm nearly healed which I'm sooo happy about but am a bit concerned that the prognosis seemed to be to expect lots of pain after multiple BMs I was hoping the LIS would stop that but apparently I now have 2 sites down there that are very easily irritated by acidic BMs so hey there you go
But when I have a good BM the difference is amazing so I can't complain too much I guess.
Think I a bit pissed as I know I will have multiple BMs for the rest of my life so was hoping to not have to accept the pain after but I guess it makes sense. I had a very deep cut on my arm after an accident and even know lots of years later if I bang that arm it hurts a lot more than normal. So of course that area will now always be more sensitive

Hi MPB

Great to hear it was good news from your CRS and that your healing up so well !

I guess that means that at least the horrendous spasms' should be a thing of the past for you eventually...!? I presume the multiple BM's give you 'the burn', which though not pleasant, is definitely more manageable. Hopefully the meds will give you a boost in that area.

As for me, I just seem stuck in a bit of a limbo. Long chat with the family over Xmas, as I'm now favouring the LIS, but they're all worried about it and the incontinence risks etc. and don't want me to go that route until I've tried everything else. They argue if I'm not in pain, I shouldn't have the op. And I'm not really in pain anymore unless I do something daft. No spasms really, just regular burns and aches if I go the toilet more than once.

Saying that, I'm only not in pain, because I manage it. I stand at work all day now, I don't/can't sit for more than about an hour or so without aggravating things, I take limited walks on flat land with the dog and no sport or training any more. My sex life is dead, just too painful and causes more damage, so consequently I don't even bother socialising any more either. I really feel I'm really just existing now rather than living. My sister wants me to try mindfullness techniques along with my treatments, but my mind would be fine, if I could just fix this bloody AF! LOL!

Anyway, I'm thinking of giving it until my 1 year anniversary (26th March!) and then if I'm still not better, than I have to do something about it and try and get my life back to something like it was before.

Take care MPB and good luck with the new meds!
Mr F

Hi
Unfortunately for me the level of pain goes up exponentially with the BMs 3/4 I'm burning and stinging over 6 and it's spasm time...he said that is to be expected as my muscle can still contract because if it couldn't I would be incontinent, so as there is not much more he can do surgically, we are now moving to medically finding meds which work consistently...for me that's always a struggle lol
Oh Mr F please please do not be swayed by what others think/say if you cannot sit cannot exercise and cannot have sex are you really living, the fissure is running your life and yes you may not be in pain but that's only because you are bending over backwards to please it.
I truly do not get people's obsession with incontinence...my sphincter tone was mega high but because ima women who has had two large babies everyone was like oooh nooo you might be incontinent...let me tell you I experienced no incontinence at all I still have to force wind out. You are a man and you plainly have high tone...would you/could you try the Botox first as a compromise to your family as that will show whether you have a risk of incontinence.
No one should have to live like that it's not normal and I'm pretty sure that if your family realised what you have to do to be pain free they would get it a bit more

Hi MPB

If only I could bend over backwards LOL!

Seriously though, thanks for the encouraging words. Deep down I already feel the LIS is the only thing that'll truly give me a chance of getting back to normal. Not convinced botox is much more than temporary relief in most cases, and if you need Gen Anesthetic too, can't see why I wouldn't just go the whole hog straight away with the LIS ? However, if it put my family's mind at rest re: incontinence, maybe I'd be willing to go the botox route first. I guess I'd ultimately follow the advice of the CRS.

Over the next few weeks I'm willing to humour my family and try some of the things they're suggesting, because I know they do have my best interests at heart, but I think you and I both know, I'll probably only get so far before the next setback. In the meantime, I can hopefully bring them round to my way of thinking, (though its difficult, as there's only so much I can say to my parents about this!) to make them understand why I want to have the op, and so they're not worrying too much when I do eventually bite the bullet...

And you're right, the fissure is running and ruining my life. I'm in my late 40's now, so not getting any younger (!) and refuse to continue living in this zombie/limbo state, as I've done the last 9 months!

Anyway, on a more positive track, its great to hear your Surgeon is willing to work with you even after your op, to try to make your BM's as manageable as possible. Shows its someone who's thorough and who cares. Pretty sure from what you've already told me about him, he'll get you there in the end !!

Thanks again, MPB.
Mr F