I finally did it!
I used the smallest dilator I had, about the size of my middle finger and used the sweet bee cream I have. Took my time and kept it in for about 10min.
Didn't hurt, and I feel fine after.
-phew!-
thanks Sav for giving me the courage!
-Tanya

congratulations ! :D what kit are you using ? I am afraid to start with one inch which seems to be the smallest in most cases. Looks like the one you have is even smaller... TP

tp,
I actually have two kits. I have one made for the vagina.
My episiotomy scar gets kinda tight sometimes. But the smaller sizes I didn't use.... til now ; )
http://www.vaginismus.com/products/dilator_set?gclid=CInLy_qk060CFQtqhwodsWKQlw
I also have this one;
http://www.amazon.com/Size-Matters-Products-Ease-In-Dilator/dp/B001VRHE78/ref=pd_sbs_hpc_12
But i had to order it from a different site for Canadian delivery.
so far so good ; )
-Tanya

Good for you Tanya!!

I'm using the Dilatan ones - 18mm and 20mm I got for now.
I have only pushed it in a little way so far, and only left it there for 1.3 minutes. Last of the brave. Changed from olive oil to KY jelly as lubricant.
Slowly slowly. Will start writing on it after a week...
And good for you for starting too, Tanya!

I'm hoping I'm pretty well healed. No pain of any kind today No pain during bms for a couple of weeks already, but the spasms though mild were still coming. Today there were none. Now I'm a firm believer in self dilation! It's so much less invasive than surgery or botox, and I very much like being in control myself. I'm working with the 1 1/4 " dilator now and intend to keep going for awhile till I can get it all the way in.

I totally agree Baba!
Us in control and not the doctors.
I am going to stick with the small one for a few more days.
So glad to hear that you are doing so well!!!

-Tanya

ordered smallest dilatan set and even smaller dialtor from amazon.
Any recommendations on Vitamin E and Oilive oil brand ?
hope this helps !
TP

I've been using sweet blessed bee magic. It has olive oil and bee stuff in it. I just like the consistency.
Kinda like the olive oil salves they make for the nipples of breastfeeding moms.
That's great tp!
-Tanya

I am kinda scared to use sweet blessed bee magic since my fissure is still sensitive.. Did you ahve any burning etc from the creame ?