i hear you rachael, i just have a couple of new tears this month, just when i was getting a handle on the old ones, sucks. will it ever end?

Hi splinter,
I think mine are the same old ones, they just can't quite fully heal, my BMs are soft and not hard to pass, I don't even push at all. Just can't work it out...... I know where you are coming from, you feel like they are under control again, then bam! They resurface their ugly heads. Where are you heading in terms of further treatment? I just can't see any light at the end of the tunnel again now, if this next CRS can't help me, I will seek out somebody who can, even if I have to travel into outer space! I just can't believe he said I was healed. Maybe the scar tissue is my problem now... God only knows, I feel like giving up?

I can't do this Anymore!! More pain on BM this morning and the dreaded pain all day long. My body just cannot take anymore of this crap. I am doing everything. Honestly I think it's the recent stress I am under that's contributing, but I can't control that. Also I called the CRS secretary today, and although I've been referred to him now by the other CRS, he can't see me until 10th April.... Now I'm losing it big time! I feel like this will never end. Maybe it won't, and I'll suffer like this forever.

hey Rachael,
I hear you, i am right with you here, more pain here, new tear here, its a vicious cycle, i am finally considering surgery, scared as heck but i will be going in early march for a surgery consultation. Hang in there rachael, there will be light at the end, there just has to be. I am off to pray, because that's all i can really do...

Hi splinter,
Good luck with the consultation, I do hope you can end the misery soon..... I will pray too. I can't even sit today without squirming in the chair. Just horrible. It really helps talking on this forum, you all understand the hell of this. People just don't get it, if they haven't had Fissures. I even hate saying the word. Ugh. I want that light.........
Thankyou Splinter. X

rachael i am sure that out of the 95 billion people that have walked this earth, many have faced this challenge and defeated it one way or another, this chapter of our lives will surely pass, we just have to hold on and pray to God, and try to find answers.

With you as well, Rachel. Looking for the light.

Oooooooooh wee racheal and all of u im so sorry u are in such pain again!!! As splinderboy said this time of our lives will pass its not forever but it sure as hell feels that way. Racheal i truly think that stess kicks spasms off again that leads to splits in the anus again, my son got beat up outside a nightclub this week and if it wasnt for the botox id b rolling in pain with the blood running out of me. I think i will b ok until about april but after that with the stress in my life the spasms will return. Doc said he wodnt do botox again for 2yrs and wodnt do lis on me. I know its hard pet but keep ur brave lovely chin up april will come to pass and they will find a way to give u relief. All my love, thoughts and prayers xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Oh I'm so sorry Rachel. Can you try calling every day to see if they have any cancellations. I too wonder if this pain is now my life. It's hard to keep hope. Try not to give in to those thoughts. Some Crs will figure it out and be able to help you! I am still hoping for my own healing but it ha been a much harder and longer road than I thought possible. One day at a time. I know now that I may have to I through more dr visits or whatever. But it will happen! Bodies heal!

Thank you everyone... Love and healing to you all. Xxx sorry about your son Puzzled, I do hope he's okay now.... Hopeful, are you healing slowly? I know you've had LIS now? Xx